I feel dazed…..

The songbirds have returned. Standing in my yard, listening to their celebrations of an early spring and eavesdropping on serenades to potential mates, I’m too grumpy (distracted?) to enjoy their glorious songs.

Those last couple of weeks of January were bit too rough, a little too much, I’m still processing events. I think I’ll just talk about one such event today.

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Our Brandy died ten days ago.
A ball of light and love wrapped in silky red hair
Brandy was our heart: sweet, silly, ornery, and little bossy
All gone.

Still youngish, never ill, she was gone in a flash.

Now, this is the part that in time will be a delight but is still a bit difficult: She died chasing a bunny. Seriously.

Dave said she was chasing the rabbit then stopped and then started running again. Her usual. (We had assumed her arthritic shoulder hampered her chases of late.). This time, however, she laid down and was gone.

Anything heart/brain/vascular could have happened. She was current with everything at the vet’s. I do believe it was simply ‘her time’. And what standard dachshund wouldn’t want their last act to be chasing a bunny? (Except for those who want to be noshing on a bit of something.).

All that being said does not make this easy.

I know we will heal. I know, given the time to process her dying, we will be fine. Not quite yet.

Update update

Today seems a bit, well, unreal. Or is it surreal. I’m awake, I’m moving and doing and have that sense of accomplishment but I don’t exactly know why. Hmm. I have done a couple of nice things in last couple of days tho….

My drawing class was lovely. My instructor spoke briefly about drawing, pencils, shading, and course objectives. And then she gestured to a table cluttered with random objects and said “get started”. Um. So we did. And she walked around talking about our drawings. I was surprised how much I enjoyed the class. Of course, the more practice the better. Haven’t drawn yet today but the day isn’t over.

Oooo….Today was weigh in day for Weight Watchers. I lost! All is right in the world again! (Heehee). Yesterday I tried the WW site’s questionnaire to see which program I would be sorted into (I suppose it is just me, but in my head I hear a tatty hat crying,”Better be Gryffindore!”). It was purple. Change is good.

Maybe it that’s it… The weight loss has given that feeling of accomplishment! That makes sense. Still, from my to do list: today I am to finish the two pairs of earrings on my work table and start on a large statement sort of necklace. I should do that. Right. Best get started.

I did get these earrings listed:

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https://www.etsy.com/listing/754459022/large-black-and-gray-polymer-clay-dangle?ref=shop_home_active_1&frs=1

Off to work. Thank you for reading!

The long game

I, like everyone else, have all sorts of dreams, hopes and yes that dreaded word – resolutions – for 2020.

As lovely the idea of having a wand (or nose wiggle or blink) to enable all these changes and improvements to actualize, I know it won’t happen. I also know it is for the best. I get it. A life long learning experience hopefully of growth, courage, and more than occasional beauty.

To that end, I have started this year with a bit of yoga and meditation topped off with WW approved breakfast and lunch. Tomorrow I will shop for my pencils for my drawing course starting next week. I need to list a couple of pairs of earrings on Etsy. A bit of dusting and tidying at home. Laundry. Grocery shopping. Better pack up the decorations. Hmmm… A wand is sounding better and better….

Happy New Year everyone!